Supernatural on location, Season 7: Bring. It.

Friday morning, another Supernatural filming notice (yay) for late-night filming in New West. That day during my coffee break, I called the show's production office to ask if either the boys or the Impala would be there, and if they would be filming interiors or exteriors (so important for stalkers to know). I was put through to location manager Russ Hamilton (the Supernatural production office has, unsurprisingly, awesome hold music; I listened to AC/DC's 'Back in Black' while waiting) and was assured yes there would be the boys, the car AND filming exteriors (what freaking good does it do me if they're filming inside a building? Can't see! CAN'T SEE!). Wahey!
So, even though I was a coughing, shivering ball of phlegm (summer colds FTL) I nutted up and re-did my makeup, fluffed up my hair and busted out my lucky bra, the one that pushes my boobs up so high they block my nasal passages. It's what Dean would do, if Dean had boobs. Amirite?

It's no wonder it takes 9 days to film an episode; in the 4+ hours I was there, 2 scenes were shot; one where Sam has a brief conversation with a blonde outside "Neal's Tavern", then walks over and kneels to something on the sidewalk she'd pointed out; and one where Sam ganks a demon-y type guy who was trying to kill a redhead (I'm guessing the redhead was also some kind of angel/demon, since Demon Guy had his hand on her forehead the way angels do just before they vaporize one of their own.

Red walks out to her car outside the "tavern", drops her car keys and is surprised by Demon Guy, who is in turn surprised by Sam, who skewers Demon Guy with a huge crescent-shaped piece of wood or bone. It didn't exactly go down like that, although that's how it will appear on the show; first they did the scene with Sam just pushing his empty hand against the demon's back (while doing the trademark out-of-breath "GAH! HUH!" that accompanies every Sam fight scene). Then they did the same thing without the car, and with the "handle" of the weapon sticking out of the demon's back, and then finally just with Sam and the demon and a stunt mattress, where the demon fell to his knees apres-gank, stayed upright for a few seconds, then toppled over face-first into the mattress, with CGI (demon skeleton lighting up inside/flash of light as angel vaporized) to be added later. On the second take the demon stayed on his knees for a long few seconds, head flung back and making all kinds of O-faces (Maybe it'll look less orgasmic on the show. Whatever, I'll never look at a demon-ganking the same way again) before toppling over, after which Sam said emphatically (to Red, and gasping as if he'd just run a marathon) "I seriously suggest you (unintelligible; could have been "wear sensible shoes" or "work out your issues")". I'm going to have to wait for the ep to find out (which is either episode 3, or 4, or 5, depending on which crew member one asked. But still, coolness. Absolute coolness.
In between takes? Everybody had a job to do but there was still some joking on the set; at one point Jared said, "Hey, Jimbo? That guy in the white shirt with the (unintelligible)...fire him, would you?" "Jimbo" turns to the guy and, pointing for emphasis, roars, "Yer fuckin' fired!" which got a laugh out of the entire crew. Also, Jared was doing some high kicks and stretches to limber up (mmm....extra bendy) and he can kick higher than most people's heads! I shouldn't be surprised given those long long legs....
So, the pictures didn't turn out great...would you like to see some blurry set pics of Jared? You would? Okay!
Pictured below: Sam & blonde random victim and two of THREE 8-foot metal fences between me and mah boo Jared.




Also, keeping things "cinematic": Making Streets Look Like It Just Rained Co. and using tree branches for dappled shadows. Did I mention the not one but three 8-foot metal fences between me and salty goodness? I did? Okay.

'Supernatural' bucket list: Hilltop Cafe

For what seems like ages, I've wanted to visit the Hilltop Cafe (a teeny diner in Abbotsford that we always drive by). I mean, it's only a 40 km drive and the sign promises "The home of Famous Pies". But mainly because Supernatural's Sam & Dean met their half-brother Adam there in season 4. Forgot? Here's a link to a 1:43 youtube clip where Dean suspects Adam is a demon and tests him with a silver knife and fork and a diner glass of holy water. The place has been used heavily for TV and movie filming, so much so that it's been closed for the past few years to be used only for film work, it's so authentically diner-y (source: Katgurl). But now it's open, turning 65 and under new management. And there's pie. Did I mention pie?


Obviously, I HAD to go.


Five minutes from the diner, a new townhouse development: Winchester Townhomes. I took it as a sign. Well, it was an actual, literal sign reading "Winchester Townhomes", but I took it as a good omen re: bacon cheeseburgers and pie.
We got there at noon, but the place was only a third full - and TINY. I was ready to wait for the end table by the window on the left, determined to eat a bacon cheeseburger and pie in the exact same spot where Dean had sat. Fortunately it was vacant, which didn't stop me from sprinting to it as if someone else had their eye on it.


I swear there is a burger underneath that somewhere. But there's also Thousand Island dressing. On the burger. WTF.
No bacon cheeseburger on the menu? That is the basic, classic, default setting for a burger. I went with the Hilltop's Classic Burger (no bacon, no cheese. Sads.) with gravy on the fries. Unfortunately, the burger had "Hilltop sauce" on it, which is Thousand Island dressing in disguise, which is GROSS. Miss M would probably disagree since she loves Big Macs like a fat kid loves cake, but for me it's always been gross. Ketchup and mayo on a burger? Mouthgasm. Thousand Island should have stayed back in the 70's on a wedge of iceberg lettuce, where it belongs. Barf barf barf. And I can appreciate a juicy burger, but this was way too messy to eat. Like, lubed-up handjob messy. And as I think I have made clear elsewhere, I am a delicate goddammed apple blossom of Canadian fucking womanhood.


So, mission NOT accomplished; we'll be back for pie in summer when a trip to nearby Driediger berry farms takes us out there. But it's more for the sense of accomplishment than anything else..and maybe for the triple chocolate bacon cookies. Definitely not for the burgers.

Sexual harassment campaign update

Or, The Continuation of Lady Effing Juno and Sir Curtis, Esq.'s IM Correspondence

Curtis: Is that a CASTIEL sugar cookie? I can tell you're counting the days until they film in your neighbourhood again.

Juno: I'm going to try to lure Jensen with a Mars Bar tied to a string, discreetly tossed his way since there's no getting past that bodyguard. THEN hit him with the roofie pie...good plan, yes?

Curtis: wait wat..He can be had for the price of a Mars bar? Hold on, I'm going out to buy one of those 4-packs

Juno: No, you get his attention with the mars bar, then reel him in (hence the string), then flash the boobs like so:
( . Y . ) < - which I haz and you don't so neener

Curtis: LOL...So, you admit you're a boob flasher. Well, acknowledgement IS the first step.

Juno: I don't WANT to unveil Shock and Awe, but I will if I have to.

Curtis: I admit to being a little surprised you didn't choose 'Sam' and 'Dean' for names.

Juno: Already taken. 'Sam' and 'Dean' are the washers in our laundry room when one takes them for a ride on spin cycle. When they start to ka-thunk, ka-thunk around the room on "spin" because of an uneven load, that's what you call a Big Daddy Winchester. Heh.

Curtis: So, we're leg-humping washing machines on 'spin' now?

Juno: Hey, I have needs. Also, I get clean clothes out of the deal, so win/win.

Curtis: You truly are elegance personified.

Juno: Believe it.

Badder Homes & Gardens: Supernatural's Guide to Demon-Proofing Yer Humble Abode

...using only a Sharpie. As cool as it would be to have a devil's trap on the ceiling, for a renter, painting a pentagram & sigils is a great way to lose your damage deposit AND scare the neighbours. But transforming a cheap rug into a stylish trap for evil sonsabitches is a fun way to spend a rainy afternoon. And practical! I mean, you just never know.

Step 1: consult Supernatural Wiki. Check!
Sharpie? Check! OK, go!


It helps tremendously to use a bit of string as a guide for the pentagram and circle; you can get a bit freestyle-ish with the sigils, but you want nice tight corners on your pentagram. (And make all your sigils look like happy sigils.) I don't have to tell you to draw on the BACK of the rug, right?


It also helps to let each stage (circle/pentagram/sigils) dry for about 10 minutes in between each one; Sharpies are permanent, but can be a bit smudgy when fresh, and you are a) walking on this thing to draw it because it's too f'n big for the table, and b) going to put it INK SIDE DOWN on the floors you are renting. Do the math.


Ta-dah! The living room is now way more demon-proof than when you started. Zombies, though...that's another matter. Let's just say there's work to be done.

Supernatural on location. Again. Some more.

The "Supernatural" filming notice taped to my front door sent me into a 30 second squee-ing fangirl loop of "OMG OMG OMG" and then "holycrapwhatamIgonnawear?" Miss M and Curtis were equally jazzed, and plans were made to watch the nearby shoot with a coffee to-go and some local eats after. The three of us love Supernatural like a fat kid loves cake; we are superfans (Miss M plans to paint a devil's trap on the underside of her trunk lid, like the Impala).


There are wins, and there are epic wins. But getting a picture with the freaking Impala falls under Astronomically Epic Win. Miss M got one too. Hai five!


Jensen Ackles doing his best James Dean.
The foliage in the picture makes it look like I'm hiding in the bushes. [Um, that wasn't the case. Just FYI.]

God, he even looks fine from the back. Mighty fine.

Supernatural on location: It's not stalking when THEY come to ME, right?

The definition of frustration: Supernatural comes to your town neighbourhood freaking block to film...and Team Padackles are utterly inaccessible. Arrrrrgh. Filming inside the house only, said house surrounded by foliage and trucks tightly bumper-to-bumper.

The upside: after drowning your frustration in a bowl of Romulan Diesel, you will successfully mind-meld with the most awesome lit-up tree EVER, like in Avatar (followed by sweaty, confusing dreams about trying to plug your ponytail into Jensen Ackles): "...Don't think of brawny forearms or nice crinkly eyes or the FUCKING ALPHA MALE PHEROMONES BLASTING OVER THE FENCE LIKE SEXY AIRBORNE CANDY ...breathe and concentrate on Echo and the Bunnymen album covers..."

Also, pilfering recycling a discarded "Temporary Filming" sign for the bedroom = WIN

aw crap, seriously?

Do not be surprised when you see all the Impala-shaped dildos in your building's recycle bin this morning. Since Jensen Ackles officially went off the market last week, people from Vancouver to…well, other places, have been throwing out fuck toys that now mock us with memories of happier times. Sadness.

You should see the fucking ridiculous shoes I now have to learn to walk in after some badly-needed retail therapy at Fluevog. Seriously, if I hit a bit of gravel, I'm going to spin out and go down in a storm of "fuckit! fuckitfuckitfuckit!"s

Pretending to pinch off the bride's head a la Kids In The Hall ["I am crushing your head!"] helped somewhat (yes, I am twelve).

and a sexual harassment campaign is born

Curtis: Nice pic of the Impala. Mmm...pretty.

Juno: If I could have sex with a car, that would be it.

Curtis: I thought you wanted to be, and I quote, "the stuffing in a Winchester sandwich"?

Juno: Next time they film locally, maybe I should carry a big sign advertising "I DO THE WEIRD STUFF".

Curtis: The crew will love that.

Juno: I'd better specify "WILL BANG SAM & DEAN FOR FOOD"

Curtis: Boooo, says the crew.

Juno: OK, revised signage: "ONE FREE HANDJOB TO 1ST PERSON TO GET ME 20 MINS ALONE WITH SAM & DEAN"
And they get theirs AFTER I get mine. I been burned before.

Curtis: You're such a classy broad.

Juno: I know, right?

Supernatural on location, 3/17

I live within spitting distance of two areas used heavily for filming in New West [which is not a big town to begin with], and Supernatural shoots there around once a month...it's just a matter of spotting the bright pink TO SET or CREW PARK signs and the SFI = Supernatural. Sneaky, yes?

After getting within four feet of the boys last August while they were filming down the street, but being too shy, dammit, to carpe that diem and ask for an autograph or say hello [I KNOW, fan FAIL.] I now had:
- a digital camera
- balls to the walls.
I had gone down to the location earlier to chat with crew and find out who was filming what when - and I have to say the Supernatural crew are the friendliest towards fans that I've encountered so far. Awesome. They actually said, "If it weren't for you [fans] we wouldn't have jobs" and one fellow, upon my fangirl squee-ing, said, Do you have two minutes?
(You're effin' A I got two minutes, dude!)
and returned with an 8 x 10 of the guys. Nice! It's on the fridge right now:

Since filming would go 8pm - 11pm, Miss M and I went to Hon's for dinner, hit Tim Horton's for coffees to go, and swung past the film set on the way home [being mistaken for "background" peeps by crew. Woo!]
So Miss M spotted the Impala ("there'sthecarThere'sTheCarTHERE'STHECAR") and I got a quick snap:


Pretty sure that was Jensen in the passenger seat...and it took everything I had not to rip open my hoody and PRESSSSS everything up against the windshield...

...like this.

The guys were done their scene [staking out an apartment building standing in for a convalescent hospital, where Matt Frewer is playing Pestilence] in two takes and soon left. A bit anticlimactic, but let's be honest: any Supernatural sighting that doesn't end with Jared's remarkably broad shoulders as my ankle rest is very definitely not PRO climax. And I'm like 0 for 2 here, dammit.
So near and yet so far. Fuck my life.

I want sprinkles on mine

What do you do when the insanely hot crushes leads of your favourite show marry/have a birthday? Say it with cake, of course. So, happy bday today Jensen Ackles and a big "whatever" on Jared Padalecki's marriage (I had to go to charm school to learn to say "whatever" instead of "this is fucking bullshit" although Curtis seems to be taking it harder than I am).
[nicked from Cakewrecks.com]

just who do I hafta bang at Tourism BC to get some Super, Natural swag?

Seen on the train home tonight:

"Super, Natural British Columbia" has been our tourism slogan/jingle since at least the seventies, [way before Winchesters were fighting evil] but unfortunately it's fallen by the wayside lately, replaced by the pretty much justified, yet smug "Best Place On Earth".

(Geddit? SuperNatural? OK.)

WANT vs. DO NOT WANT

Arm porn: pretty much the most flesh on display in Supernatural. I feel like a Victorian-era horndog who has just gotten a glimpse of raw, hot, SEXAY ankle.
Dlisted.com reports some other piece won the role of Conan the Barbarian in a franchise reboot over Jared. Fuck my life. Seriously. Jared Padalecki in fur undies on a 3-story multiplex screen would SO have made up for the straight-to-DVD Christmas movie, Thomas Kinkade’s Home for Christmas, that I misspent an hour of my life watching online during the Christmas holidays. My only excuse is Supernatural was on hiatus and I was jonesing badly.
Even so, I still bailed at the movie's halfway point.
It's not that Jared's bad in it [although I will never watch it again], it's the character he plays, Thomas Fucking Kinkade, hack painter extraordinaire. I hate the unbearable tweeness that is Kinkade and I'm talking HAAAAATE with the burning intensity of a thousand fiery suns kind of hate. The man churns out sugary sweet cottages with warm light glowing from every window, OVER AND FUCKING OVER AND O.V.E.R. In point of fact, for that much orange glow to come from any window would actually mean the inside of the house was on fire [Jesus, do I wish. Maybe with the unbearably twee occupants trapped inside as well.]

Below, a video review from pajiba.com (worth it for the payoff of the reviewer totally losing his shit laughing at the 1:30 mark and dropping the camera)

Jared in a Kinkade biopic instead of a loincloth? Oh HELL NO. There is no God.

random hotness

This picture is best viewed from atop a washing machine on "spin", with clothespins on your nips and being told repeatedly that you're a dirty, DIRTY girl.
Well, maybe that's just me.
Gawd, he's so pretty it hurts. I'm a sucker for the nice crinkly eyes too.


That is all.

I love the smell of cinnamon in the morning. Smells like "coping".

At left: sweet nectar of the gods and Jared Padalecki's remarkably broad shoulders. Sigh. Cinnamon toaster waffles and whipped cream makes everything better.
-edited to add that a second look at the photo makes it appear I am trying to tempt the little people on the screen with waffles & wipp cremes. I'm not that delusional yet, but there's no denying Sam is eyeing that waffle. Heh.

Supernatural superfans at work

At left: Plastic Winchester Theatre! I love the caption: *fight is on* [Sam, naturally, is the one taken out early in the fight, as we all know he majorly sucks at hand-to-hand combat.]

Oh god, I am wiping tears from my eyes. Just discovered "Plastic!Winchester Theatre" a massive collection of hard/demented work a Supernatural superfan has done.

and totally unrelated to Plastic Winchesters, YouTubey goodness: "Supernatural - Do You Like Waffles?"

Hee. Oh, my sides hurt.

lamest girl in blogland breaks radio silence

At left:

"What's a Winchester sandwich?"

Hey, y'all. I'm still here, and normally Tuesdays are a TV wasteland so I can siddown and update, but: Supernatural season 4 comes out on DVD today, so there will be something on TV tonight. Oh my yes.

Oh, and the day you say, It's OK, I don't hafta wash my hair tonight, I'll just ponytail the ganky mass back and get one more day out of it? THAT will be the day the Supernatural crew comes to your 'hood to film. Trust me on this.