Presented without comment: Ain't it good to be alive

Supernatural on location, Season 7: Bring. It.

Friday morning, another Supernatural filming notice (yay) for late-night filming in New West. That day during my coffee break, I called the show's production office to ask if either the boys or the Impala would be there, and if they would be filming interiors or exteriors (so important for stalkers to know). I was put through to location manager Russ Hamilton (the Supernatural production office has, unsurprisingly, awesome hold music; I listened to AC/DC's 'Back in Black' while waiting) and was assured yes there would be the boys, the car AND filming exteriors (what freaking good does it do me if they're filming inside a building? Can't see! CAN'T SEE!). Wahey!
So, even though I was a coughing, shivering ball of phlegm (summer colds FTL) I nutted up and re-did my makeup, fluffed up my hair and busted out my lucky bra, the one that pushes my boobs up so high they block my nasal passages. It's what Dean would do, if Dean had boobs. Amirite?

It's no wonder it takes 9 days to film an episode; in the 4+ hours I was there, 2 scenes were shot; one where Sam has a brief conversation with a blonde outside "Neal's Tavern", then walks over and kneels to something on the sidewalk she'd pointed out; and one where Sam ganks a demon-y type guy who was trying to kill a redhead (I'm guessing the redhead was also some kind of angel/demon, since Demon Guy had his hand on her forehead the way angels do just before they vaporize one of their own.

Red walks out to her car outside the "tavern", drops her car keys and is surprised by Demon Guy, who is in turn surprised by Sam, who skewers Demon Guy with a huge crescent-shaped piece of wood or bone. It didn't exactly go down like that, although that's how it will appear on the show; first they did the scene with Sam just pushing his empty hand against the demon's back (while doing the trademark out-of-breath "GAH! HUH!" that accompanies every Sam fight scene). Then they did the same thing without the car, and with the "handle" of the weapon sticking out of the demon's back, and then finally just with Sam and the demon and a stunt mattress, where the demon fell to his knees apres-gank, stayed upright for a few seconds, then toppled over face-first into the mattress, with CGI (demon skeleton lighting up inside/flash of light as angel vaporized) to be added later. On the second take the demon stayed on his knees for a long few seconds, head flung back and making all kinds of O-faces (Maybe it'll look less orgasmic on the show. Whatever, I'll never look at a demon-ganking the same way again) before toppling over, after which Sam said emphatically (to Red, and gasping as if he'd just run a marathon) "I seriously suggest you (unintelligible; could have been "wear sensible shoes" or "work out your issues")". I'm going to have to wait for the ep to find out (which is either episode 3, or 4, or 5, depending on which crew member one asked. But still, coolness. Absolute coolness.
In between takes? Everybody had a job to do but there was still some joking on the set; at one point Jared said, "Hey, Jimbo? That guy in the white shirt with the (unintelligible)...fire him, would you?" "Jimbo" turns to the guy and, pointing for emphasis, roars, "Yer fuckin' fired!" which got a laugh out of the entire crew. Also, Jared was doing some high kicks and stretches to limber up (mmm....extra bendy) and he can kick higher than most people's heads! I shouldn't be surprised given those long long legs....
So, the pictures didn't turn out great...would you like to see some blurry set pics of Jared? You would? Okay!
Pictured below: Sam & blonde random victim and two of THREE 8-foot metal fences between me and mah boo Jared.




Also, keeping things "cinematic": Making Streets Look Like It Just Rained Co. and using tree branches for dappled shadows. Did I mention the not one but three 8-foot metal fences between me and salty goodness? I did? Okay.

I'm a freaking cookie genius: Sugar-free pot-infused peanut butter chocolate bombs

I'm a goddamned cookie genius. Seriously. I tweaked this recipe from food.com with the addition of cannabis and chocolate. How could this possibly go wrong?
I subbed pot-infused olive oil (thank you, BC Compassion Club) for the vegetable oil in the recipe and added 200 grams of chocolate. Yes, half a pound IS a lot, that's the point. The peanut-y dough is basically just a delivery system for chocolate, just as it should be. At 200 grams, this is the closest I've come to the perfect peanut/chocolate ratio found in a Reese's cup. Heaven. Totally worth getting fat over. And any herb taste in the oil is totally undetectable in the cookie. WIN.
One word: these are sugar free, made with Splenda/granular sugar substitute, and to be honest, you really DO need sugar for a chewy cookie. The texture of these is a little sandy, but they are freaking DELICIOUS.
Yields 24 cookies.

Ingredients
1 cup plus 2 tablespoons flour
1/2 cup Splenda granular
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
2/3 cup creamy natural-style peanut butter
1/8 cup pot-infused olive oil
AND
1/8 cup vegetable or olive oil (plain)
1 egg
2 tablespoons water
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 cup/200 grams chocolate chips

Whether you make this with cannabis-infused oil, or straight vegetable/olive oil, the total amount of oil used should be 1/4 cup. Got it? Good.

Directions:
Set oven to 375 degrees.
Put parchment paper down on a cookie sheet.
In a bowl combine flour, Splenda and baking powder.
In a separate bowl, blend together peanut butter, oil, egg, water and vanilla; mix well to combine.
Mix wet with dry ingredients. I had to get in with my bare hands and squidge the wet and dry ingredients together....what?
Add the chocolate chips to the dough. Don't worry if it looks like the dough is barely holding the chocolate chips together.
Shape into 1-inch balls and place on the cookie sheet.
Gently flatten each cookie slightly with a fork.
Bake for about 10-12 minutes, or until lightly browned (I went 14 minutes)
Let cool on wire racks. You will be tempted to eat them all. Resist it.

Perfect day

If 2011's lack of posts here has taught me anything about myself, it's that I'm apparently really big on "If you don't have anything funny to say, don't say anything at all", but with school

Community college: ain't no shame in attending one; the shame is for when the college can't spell "invalid" on their fucking official stamp.

and a new job - yippee, hurray!

...that pays 30% less than it should [UN-yippee, UN-hurray]

I had nothing funny left to say. Period.
Which made Saturday's breakfast with Miss M at Sophie's Cosmic Cafe in Kits even more full of win. We hadn't hung out in what felt like forever, found a parking spot right around the corner [savour the little victories] and not only was there no lineup, we had our pick of spots [patio, yay!] My camera battery picked a terrible time to crap out, but their eggs benny is amaaaazingg; there was almost no conversation after our food arrived, just serious eating. And then a trip to a shop devoted entirely to candy and then Zulu records. Much-needed good times.
It's just nice to win one, you know?

'Supernatural' bucket list: Hilltop Cafe

For what seems like ages, I've wanted to visit the Hilltop Cafe (a teeny diner in Abbotsford that we always drive by). I mean, it's only a 40 km drive and the sign promises "The home of Famous Pies". But mainly because Supernatural's Sam & Dean met their half-brother Adam there in season 4. Forgot? Here's a link to a 1:43 youtube clip where Dean suspects Adam is a demon and tests him with a silver knife and fork and a diner glass of holy water. The place has been used heavily for TV and movie filming, so much so that it's been closed for the past few years to be used only for film work, it's so authentically diner-y (source: Katgurl). But now it's open, turning 65 and under new management. And there's pie. Did I mention pie?


Obviously, I HAD to go.


Five minutes from the diner, a new townhouse development: Winchester Townhomes. I took it as a sign. Well, it was an actual, literal sign reading "Winchester Townhomes", but I took it as a good omen re: bacon cheeseburgers and pie.
We got there at noon, but the place was only a third full - and TINY. I was ready to wait for the end table by the window on the left, determined to eat a bacon cheeseburger and pie in the exact same spot where Dean had sat. Fortunately it was vacant, which didn't stop me from sprinting to it as if someone else had their eye on it.


I swear there is a burger underneath that somewhere. But there's also Thousand Island dressing. On the burger. WTF.
No bacon cheeseburger on the menu? That is the basic, classic, default setting for a burger. I went with the Hilltop's Classic Burger (no bacon, no cheese. Sads.) with gravy on the fries. Unfortunately, the burger had "Hilltop sauce" on it, which is Thousand Island dressing in disguise, which is GROSS. Miss M would probably disagree since she loves Big Macs like a fat kid loves cake, but for me it's always been gross. Ketchup and mayo on a burger? Mouthgasm. Thousand Island should have stayed back in the 70's on a wedge of iceberg lettuce, where it belongs. Barf barf barf. And I can appreciate a juicy burger, but this was way too messy to eat. Like, lubed-up handjob messy. And as I think I have made clear elsewhere, I am a delicate goddammed apple blossom of Canadian fucking womanhood.


So, mission NOT accomplished; we'll be back for pie in summer when a trip to nearby Driediger berry farms takes us out there. But it's more for the sense of accomplishment than anything else..and maybe for the triple chocolate bacon cookies. Definitely not for the burgers.

lamest girl in blogland breaks radio silence, part deux

So, you know how you can sorta lose touch with friends, and the longer you go without saying "hi", the more awkward it becomes ? So....
Hi. I'm back.

Sexual harassment campaign update

Or, The Continuation of Lady Effing Juno and Sir Curtis, Esq.'s IM Correspondence

Curtis: Is that a CASTIEL sugar cookie? I can tell you're counting the days until they film in your neighbourhood again.

Juno: I'm going to try to lure Jensen with a Mars Bar tied to a string, discreetly tossed his way since there's no getting past that bodyguard. THEN hit him with the roofie pie...good plan, yes?

Curtis: wait wat..He can be had for the price of a Mars bar? Hold on, I'm going out to buy one of those 4-packs

Juno: No, you get his attention with the mars bar, then reel him in (hence the string), then flash the boobs like so:
( . Y . ) < - which I haz and you don't so neener

Curtis: LOL...So, you admit you're a boob flasher. Well, acknowledgement IS the first step.

Juno: I don't WANT to unveil Shock and Awe, but I will if I have to.

Curtis: I admit to being a little surprised you didn't choose 'Sam' and 'Dean' for names.

Juno: Already taken. 'Sam' and 'Dean' are the washers in our laundry room when one takes them for a ride on spin cycle. When they start to ka-thunk, ka-thunk around the room on "spin" because of an uneven load, that's what you call a Big Daddy Winchester. Heh.

Curtis: So, we're leg-humping washing machines on 'spin' now?

Juno: Hey, I have needs. Also, I get clean clothes out of the deal, so win/win.

Curtis: You truly are elegance personified.

Juno: Believe it.

fa la la la la

Snow day snow day snow day!

What? Look, sometimes you have to make your own fun.

and THAT was the moment I decided "Fuck the earth, I am driving EVERYWHERE from now on."

At left: Mind bleach NOW, please.
All in all today was interesting - saw a rainbow, brought home a sack of chili/ lavender/ bergamot chocolates (and a cappuccino on the house!) from my new favourite shop and oh yeah - SOME DUDE HAD HIS DICK OUT on the train home. He was quickly bounced at the next stop (thanks, Green Ballcap Guy!) and it sparked some fascinating conversation about the weirdest thing you'd ever seen on SkyTrain. (The guy behind me won hands down with a sighting of a dude tearing off his own ear.) Transit is a harsh and often crazy mistress. Like, burn your shit on the front lawn crazy.

Octoberfest

Wow, October was busy. Wallowing in new movies for the first two weeks at the Vancouver International Film Festival, college applications, milestone birthday and Halloween (BEST. HOLIDAY. EVER.) Basically a whirlwind of weird cinema, cake, stress eating and costumes – why can’t every month be October?

Happy Halloween

Badder Homes & Gardens: Supernatural's Guide to Demon-Proofing Yer Humble Abode

...using only a Sharpie. As cool as it would be to have a devil's trap on the ceiling, for a renter, painting a pentagram & sigils is a great way to lose your damage deposit AND scare the neighbours. But transforming a cheap rug into a stylish trap for evil sonsabitches is a fun way to spend a rainy afternoon. And practical! I mean, you just never know.

Step 1: consult Supernatural Wiki. Check!
Sharpie? Check! OK, go!


It helps tremendously to use a bit of string as a guide for the pentagram and circle; you can get a bit freestyle-ish with the sigils, but you want nice tight corners on your pentagram. (And make all your sigils look like happy sigils.) I don't have to tell you to draw on the BACK of the rug, right?


It also helps to let each stage (circle/pentagram/sigils) dry for about 10 minutes in between each one; Sharpies are permanent, but can be a bit smudgy when fresh, and you are a) walking on this thing to draw it because it's too f'n big for the table, and b) going to put it INK SIDE DOWN on the floors you are renting. Do the math.


Ta-dah! The living room is now way more demon-proof than when you started. Zombies, though...that's another matter. Let's just say there's work to be done.

A dark day for us all

Last night I met Miss M & Brian at Hon's with plans to share lettuce wraps, potstickers, and a chicken-and-prawn potato nest (a crispy "bowl" of shredded potato, deep-fried and filled with broccoli, prawns, chicken and savoury brown sauce for about $10). We were gobsmacked to learn it was no longer available; apparently the fried "nest" (the best part!) is too time-consuming to make.
Sads. I will be spamming their comment box with pleas to bring it back.

Let me eat cake: sugar-free pot brownies

I had a tightly wrapped 1/2 cup of the BC Compassion Club's sativa butter in the fridge and a jones for a sugar-free dessert that wasn't fruit-based [Fruit crisp, I love you, but sometimes a woman needs some alone time with her chocolate. You understand, right?]
I tweaked this recipe which was originally from a Splenda recipe booklet. The single review mentioned the resulting brownie's "flatness", but I figured an extra scoop of baking powder would help. That, and doubling the recipe. And using pot butter.

When baking with cannabis butter ["cannabutter"], it's a good idea to go half cannabis butter, and half regular butter. Partly because it's potent and that's all you need, and partly because pot-infused butter tastes like, well, pot-infused butter. It can be overpowering if used straight [why I usually use the cannabutter in a garlicky bruschetta; to hide the taste, and because I love garlic. Pervertedly].

These turned out great; when cooled, it was a moist, dense sugar-free cake - and the applesauce and walnuts make it practically good for you. The cocoa masked virtually all taste of the cannabutter. I was so focused on getting to the end product ["whee, pot brownies!"] it wasn't until I had the more-cakey-than-chewy brownie moist chocolate cake with walnuts cooling on a wire rack that I realized I had made my first cake from scratch! Go me!
Best of all, I still had 1/4 cup of unused cannabutter in the fridge for the next attempt; I'm thinking of using darker cocoa, omitting the walnuts, and spooning preserved cherries over the cake. Oh my.

I tweaked the recipe from Food.com and doubled their version. My doubled, tweaked, pot-infused version [which can be halved and/or made with plain butter only, if that's the way you roll] is below:

Ingredients:

• 1 ^1/2 cup all-purpose flour
  
• 1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa
  
• 1 ^1/2 cup Splenda granular, sugar substitute
  
• 3 teaspoons baking powder
  
• 1 cup walnuts, chopped
  
• 1/4 cup plain unsalted butter, softened
  AND
  
• 1/4 cup cannabis butter, softened
  
• 1 cup unsweetened applesauce
  
• 4 eggs
  
• 2 tablespoons vanilla extract
  
• 4 tablespoons mini chocolate chips
  

Tip: butter will soften quickly if cut into small cubes [pictured]. If you want to make this without cannabutter, make sure the total amount of regular butter you use is 1/2 c. for the doubled recipe shown here, or 1/4 c. if halving the recipe.

Directions:

• Preheat oven to 350 degrees and grease a 8" x 8" baking dish with butter
  
• Combine flour, cocoa, Splenda and baking powder in a large bowl
  
• Stir in walnuts
  
• In another bowl, combine butter(s), applesauce, eggs and vanilla extract mixing well with a wire whisk [I went to town with my newly-acquired $20 electric mixer...the power! No more sore wrists! Mwahahahaha!]
  
• Add wet mixture to dry mixture and mix gently to combine.
  
• Fold in chocolate chips.
  
• Spread batter in dish and bake for 35 minutes.
  
• Cool on wire racks.
  
• Nom with a cold glass of milk. Enjoy smallish portions until you know where you're at; overdoing it on cannabis edibles can be uncomfortable. Just FYI.
  

Supernatural on location. Again. Some more.

The "Supernatural" filming notice taped to my front door sent me into a 30 second squee-ing fangirl loop of "OMG OMG OMG" and then "holycrapwhatamIgonnawear?" Miss M and Curtis were equally jazzed, and plans were made to watch the nearby shoot with a coffee to-go and some local eats after. The three of us love Supernatural like a fat kid loves cake; we are superfans (Miss M plans to paint a devil's trap on the underside of her trunk lid, like the Impala).


There are wins, and there are epic wins. But getting a picture with the freaking Impala falls under Astronomically Epic Win. Miss M got one too. Hai five!


Jensen Ackles doing his best James Dean.
The foliage in the picture makes it look like I'm hiding in the bushes. [Um, that wasn't the case. Just FYI.]

God, he even looks fine from the back. Mighty fine.

Supernatural on location: It's not stalking when THEY come to ME, right?

The definition of frustration: Supernatural comes to your town neighbourhood freaking block to film...and Team Padackles are utterly inaccessible. Arrrrrgh. Filming inside the house only, said house surrounded by foliage and trucks tightly bumper-to-bumper.

The upside: after drowning your frustration in a bowl of Romulan Diesel, you will successfully mind-meld with the most awesome lit-up tree EVER, like in Avatar (followed by sweaty, confusing dreams about trying to plug your ponytail into Jensen Ackles): "...Don't think of brawny forearms or nice crinkly eyes or the FUCKING ALPHA MALE PHEROMONES BLASTING OVER THE FENCE LIKE SEXY AIRBORNE CANDY ...breathe and concentrate on Echo and the Bunnymen album covers..."

Also, pilfering recycling a discarded "Temporary Filming" sign for the bedroom = WIN

More Farmers Market Shi- uh, Stuff

from top left: salty-sweet kettle corn; Happy Grater Is Happy; another bag filled for $20 with eggs, garlic, sweet onions, lettuce, eggplant, zucchini, and bunches of orange (orange!) beets.

RIP Ninja Video. NOW where the fuck am I supposed to watch 'Supernatural'?

The US government has ridden into town and saved us all from Archer cartoons and Supernatural reruns! I mean, their economy is in tatters, they're stuck in their longest-running war EVER and assorted biblical plagues, yet they still have time to save the world from streaming video. Thank GOD the US government is here to make things right.

Unlike past anti-piracy efforts, the sites did not actually offer the movies for download, but instead streamed the movies and TV shows against ads.

Dear Operation In Our Sites, please feel free to eat a bag of dicks. It's all yours. Enjoy.