re: election: dear America, please don't fuck this up again. Seriously, we're getting sick of your shit.

smackdown: Amy Winehouse vs. Kung Fu Panda

Halloween eve and still trying to decide between going out as a fatty Amy Winehouse [black out a tooth, paint eyes shut and "style" hair in wind tunnel] or taking the dark eye makeup to its logical conclusion and going as Kung Fu Panda.

Hmm. If I go as Amy Winehouse, I can smoke crack all night and people will just assume it's the costume.

OK, Kung Fu Panda it is, then.

buy buy buy!

Best Buy has Buffy and Angel DVD sets on for twenty bucks, with a free DVD of a 2008 cast reunion with purchase. Crafty folk will buy the sets one at a time, thereby accumulating quite a hoard of bonus DVDs. I splashed out on the bottomless pit of despair that is season 6 Buffy, because:

-Musical episode!

-Anya episode ["Selfless"]

-I've never seen the S6 finale. Ever!

-the steaming hot bowl of oral sex that is Spike

banned candy

Happy Bats is using their powers for good, again; this time they're running a cool Buffy contest/giveaway until the end of the month. Friends of the batfolk have diabetes, and since there won't be any Buffy musical this year [and the last few Buffy singalongs have been for charity], the two great tastes that taste great together [charity, and Buffy] have come together to kick diabetes in the slats.

Even if they hadn't dangled a chance to win Buff stuff in front of me, I would still be first in line to donate; I found out this spring I have type II diabetes. Going sugar-free isn't too bad, except for when I really, really want a Caesar, which it turns out are just loaded with sugar. Thank god for sugar-free sweets: I've found a reliable source of sugar-free 70% chocolate and maple walnut ice cream at, respectively, Denny's Farm Market and 6th Ave Deli, both in New Westminster.

Anyway. Life with diabetes isn't all sugar-free sweets. There's also the fun of making sure your feet don't turn black. I'm just glad I can take a once-daily pill at this point to control it, and don't have to monitor my bloodsugar beyond occasional bloodwork, and best of all, no needles.

So go give. You have until October 31st, and even a few bucks gets you a chance at a cool prize, good karma, and, again, the chance to kick diabetes in the slats.

Go here for news of Buffy screenings and the link to donate to the Canadian Diabetes Association, and hints of the bound-to-be cool prize from Happy Bats:

http://flickerbat.typepad.com/being_there/buffy-musical-tickets.html

JCVD @ Vancouver International Film Festival, 9/27

Screw the red carpet glam, what you want to be caught wearing at a premiere is a styling, slimming Happy Bats tee-shirt. Not only will it get you better seats at the movies, you'll also get better tables in restaurants and members of the opposite sex will be especially keen to get a get a leg up over you.

Saturday night, arrived at the theatre for JCVD with half an hour to spare with the idea of just swanning in for my pick of seats, but no. The lineup, for ticketholders, stretched down Granville, around Smithe and just kept on going. Even though I was about halfway down the line, by the time I got into the theatre the place was looking pretty damn full, and one of the guys from Happy Bats [who were presenting the film], seeing my Bats shirt, invited me to sit in their reserved row. Woo! [Yes, I am a great big nerdy fangirl.] There was an attendant and a rope and everything! Okay, a volunteer and a string, but still.

The movie was awesome. Basically it's Jean-Claude Van Damme as Jean-Claude Van Damme, and it turns out it kind of sucks to be Jean-Claude: he's an aging action star turning out boilerplate movies [when he's not losing parts to Steven Seagal], he's on the losing end of a child custody battle and he's into his lawyer for a buttload of money he doesn't have. He arrives in Belgium and after a quick snap with the video store clerks across from a post office/bank ["Hey, Jean-Claude, you're our star! You fought to get out of this shithole!"], walks right into a hostage situation at the post office. It's not long before his captors are begging their star to show off moves like kicking a cigarette out of a guy's mouth while the outside world, including the police [whose Command Central is the video store across the street], and hordes of cheering, banner-waving fans think the Muscles From Brussels has embarked on a life of crime.

Just go see it. The guy can act, in his native French, no less, and it's a smart movie parody with humour and action and tension.

because culture is good for you, asshole

It seems the Happy Bats graphic shows up weirdly in some browsers, so here they are in all their four-colour glory, nicked directly from their website and brought farm fresh to you, gentle reader. Happy Bats is also sponsoring a showing of JCVD during this year's Vancouver International Film Festival. Which I don't have tickets for yet, but I do have the catalogue. So tonight I'll sit down with the guide, plenty of Post-Its, or maybe just decide the movies I'll see with a dart board. Yes, it's holiday time chez Juno, and I can't afford to leave the city. But being stuck in Vancouver in the autumn with nothing more to do than go to movies with friends and hit the Night Market....well, there are worse fates. Even though I love Vancouver long time, I still want to crush with my bare hands every car I see with the Olympic 2010 "Best place on earth" vanity plate. Those dicks are totally asking for it.

If imitation is flattery, then I still want to put a boot up this chick's ass

Yes, I am shallow enough to Google my own blog.
But I'm not shallow enough to try to pass off others' original work as my own, while the braintrust at http://msraven.blogspot apparently *is* just that shallow. And stupid. I mean, who says "check out my other sites in development" and lists 21 different blogs, including mine? I don't mind if y'all link to the site, but actually impersonating me? Seriously people, please don't steal my fucking work.